Mouse ears, tears and the potty train

Dress rehearsal night for the Saturday performance of the Grayce DeWitt Dance Recital.
And where was I you ask. Was I cooling my heels front row center watching darling cherubs flit across the stage. Not even! I was in the "green" room with approximately 50 5 and 6 year olds trying to wrestle them in and out of costumes in time to line them up to head back on stage.
Ice this cake with about 20 pre-teen "hip-hop" dancers who spent the better part of the evening running the length of the room, standing on their heads against the wall and in general working the 5 and 6 year olds into a frenzy and you have a masterpiece of potential meltdown.
One little group of sweeties had these precious costumes but after their tap routine, their hats had to come off and they had to don mouse ears (with elastic), a velvet bowtie (also with elastic) and a tail that needed to be pinned on their costume. First of all, all elastic was too long requiring us to tie it in knots, wrap it around hair buns or in the case of one innovative mother, cut it off (we knew this wasn't a good idea) but what do you do. No one had included a safety pin with their tail so that was an experience. What makes matters really interesting is some of these little girls are actually 4 and are so petrified they can't remember their own name. This makes lining them up interesting - I'm thinking of suggesting they all come tattooed next year.
We had about 3 who cried, clung to their mothers and didn't want to dance, 2 that were allergic to their costumes, a few who were late and several that just didn't bother to show up at all.
There was a water fountain in the room with paper cups and that was a big no-no. They drank water like camels who had been lost in the Sahara for months and then they ALL had to go potty. Poor Kaylee had a hard time accomplishing anything other than leading strings of little girls to the bathroom. Remember, they are all wearing costumes that have to be pulled down or taken off, tights, etc. Suddenly nude dancing doesn't seem like such a bad idea.
And then you have the mothers who jump your case because her daughter's mouse ears fell off during the dance. Are you kidding me, lady! Please feel free to volunteer to do this any old time you would like and see if you can get them out of one rig into another and make sure all their parts are on their costume, shoes tied, strings tucked in, pottied and ready to dance! And did you by any chance think ahead to include objects that would secure loose items, like safety pins, bobby pins, etc. No, you just want to take issue with the people helping because your child lost her ears. Crap, Audrey shuffled so hard at her rehearsal Wed. night that her tap shoe came off and flew into the audience. She was our miniature version of Gallagher. At least she wasn't smashing watermelons.
All in all it went pretty well so I'm hopeful that Sat night will pass without a major crisis. All helpers are supposed to wear fairy wings, crowns and have their magic wands. I'm opting for a wicked step-mother hat complete with whip and chair.
Valap, valap, valap ball change shuffle!