Dis-Engagement Announcement

There will be no funny in this post but I am needing to just release some very negative energy and this seems to be a fairly non-threatening way to do so.
My desire to help my mother has run into a brick wall. A seemingly unstoppable force (me) has met the ultimate immovable object (mom). I would blame this event on dementia were it not for the fact that my mom remembers these things and feeds on them and uses them as building blocks to reinforce her wall.
She has started to not only control her own course but mine as well. Unfortunately, this is not something that I have the luxury of allowing. My life is still in full flight and I can't take a hiatus from it. At this extremely crazy time in life, people and things MUST assimilate into life as Roger and I know it. I cannot change and be all things to all people at all times.
My mother is on a collision course with becoming a total invalid because she thinks she is gaining control by refusing to eat or take any nourishment. All doctors, nurses and just general observers have noticed how she is letting me do everything for her and then punishing me in return.
She has never pushed a nurses' call button, she won't speak up and say what she wants, how she feels, but expects me to do these things and then accuses me of dreadful things.
She has now decided that I hit her and have all my life. I have never laid a hand on my mother. That being said...what she richly needs at this moment is a good sound spanking.
I know that many of the things that are happening can be attributed to the dementia, however, no one knows my mother quite like I do and believe me some of this stuff is not anything but just good old fashioned cussedness.
Therefore, in the esteemed opinion of all medical personnel and my own knowledge of mom and her little quirks, I need to get off at the rest stop and rethink my chosen route.
If she is bent on becoming an invalid, then she is going to have to learn how to depend on people who have been trained to care for the sick. That will free up my time and mind to simply love her. So, as of today, I have become dis-engaged in all things but my affection for her and my genuine desire to see to it that she is well cared for. But I am going to step back into the life that I have ignored for 2 months. I want to be my daughter's mother, my son's mother, my grandchildren's Mee-maw and most importantly, my husband's wife. I almost forgot that while I owe my mother a great deal, I owe those other people the best that I can give them too.
I realize that not everyone who reads this will agree with my decision. However, I hope that you will understand that no one knows another's journey until their feet have walked in their shoes. Agree with me or disagree but please continue to pray for all of us as we walk this path together.