My mother lives in Amarillo Texas. She has a birthday coming up next month. She is well into her 80's. She has always enjoyed great health, had enough money to live comfortably and has enjoyed her independence. I'm very grateful for her ability to live alone, think for herself, maintain her own lifestyle and be independent.
The last year has started to show a slight decline in her health. I talk to her everyday and some days I can tell she really feels bad. She has fallen several times, experienced some dizzy spells and I know she doesn't eat properly. My mother has a love affair with sugar and would eliminate all food substances from her diet and exist solely on sugar if she had her druthers. And, unfortunately, she has her druthers.
Several weeks ago we discussed the fact that she eats NO protein. When asked what she had eaten that day she replied that she had 3 bowls of ice cream and 2 Butterfinger candybars. I tried to impress on her the need to have some veggies and some meat, chicken or fish.
Now, dear readers, understand my position. I am her ONLY child. I live in Arkansas, my 2 children live in Arkansas, their children live in Arkansas and mom's only surviving sibling lives in Arkansas. Mom has no family in Texas...NONE. She has few friends (all as old as she is.)
In order to do anything for her it would involve at least a 9 hour car trip. Thanks to 9 - 11 buying a plane ticket on a moment's notice is practically financially impossible - not to mention that it is almost impossible as well.
Roger went this week and checked into a nice retirement based Mobile home community similar to the one she enjoys in Texas. Further, he checked into the cost of moving her trailer here. Following is a summary of the conversation I had with my mother this morning.
Me: Here's all the info on Flat Rock Village - there are some homes there for sale or you could sell your home in Amarillo and take the $ and purchase another one here.
Mom: Well that would mean I'd have to come out there and look.
Me: Would you rather sell yours and then just look at homes there and then let me know what you choose and we could get it here, move it in and get it ready?
Mom: I think I'm just too tired to move.
Me: I'm not trying to pressure you but I would like for you to make your decisions while you still have options and can make those decisions yourself.
Mom: Well, how would we make all this happen?
Me: First you have to decide what you want to do - then we can start pulling together the details.
Mom: There are lots of people here my age that are managing fine.
Me: Yes mom and I'm pretty confident that they all have at least one person who could be there quickly if needed.
Mom: Well at my age there wouldn't be any need to hurry.
Me: I'm not talking about dying - I'm talking about if something needed to be decided that you were unable to do for yourself. I would not be able to get there quickly enough to help you.
Mom: Well I don't have that many years left anyway.
Me: Mom I know you are getting older that is why I would like to be able to spend time with you before anything happens.
Mom: I think I'll go get some moving boxes and pack up all my stuff.
Me: Why would you do that before you decide what you want to do. All you will be doing is living around a bunch of boxes.
Mom: Well, I'd be able to decide - I might just want to rent an apartment.
Me: Rent an apartment where?
Mom: Here in Amarillo.
Me: How is that solving our problem?
Mom: Well then if anything happened, the trailer would already be sold and you wouldn't have to deal with any of it.
Me: Mom, I don't want you to base your decision on that. If something happened I will gladly take care of selling your trailer and dealing with all the details involved. I'm not concerned with that - I'm concerned with you being so far away.
Mom: I just hate the thought of moving somewhere where I don't know anyone.
Me: THIS IS WHAT I WANTED TO SAY!!! So basically you would rather be around mere acquaintances than your whole damned family?
THIS IS WHAT I DID SAY...Mom, you do know people here, your family is here, all of it. Your child, your grandchildren, your great grandchildren (that you barely have seen - didn't say this just wanted to), and your sister along with the whole extended family.
I give up. She literally would rather die alone than be around her family. And at some point I am going to feel like the worst daughter ever because I didn't look after my mother. Honestly I am so frustrated that I could almost do something drastic. Her trailer is titled in my name, I could almost sell the thing and force her to move I am so PO'd. If anyone has any suggestions I would welcome your input because I am at the wall without a place to go.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Every Girl Needs a Puppy
Of course it is no secret that I believe one can never have too many dogs. However, one frequently has more dogs than one can afford. That being said, there is nothing like a puppy to lift the spirits.
From the moment I learned Genevieve was getting a puppy for her birthday, my excitement ran high. I looked at the picture of that puppy on the breeders website and anticipated the day he would become a fuzzy member of our family.
In order to keep him a surprise until the big "reveal", Roger and I drove to Hazen, AR to pick him up for Kaylee. Do you believe in love at first sight (or bite?) He was just too precious for words and he rode all the way back to Fort Smith in my lap. We had taken Jessie (our princess dog) with us and she was less than impressed. I could read her little canine mind "Oh crap - here comes another dog!" She wanted nothing to do with him. She was further incensed over the fact that he was residing with us overnight and horrors or all horrors he slept in the bed with HER mother!!!
Genevieve took him home on Sunday and Jessie was most relieved to see him go.
I had agreed to take him to work with me to work on his potty training so every morning he loaded up with me and off we went. Some days he came home with me in the afternoon and Jessie was still undone over his presence.
But suddenly a funny thing happened. We started to notice that Jessie was sulking and appeared to be very unhappy. We couldn't figure out what her deal was, sick, bored, any number of maladies that could be affecting our precious girl dog.
We decided to experiment - we went and got Charly and brought him to our house. Good grief! Jessie was euphoric - they played great games of Frisbee in the yard. Jessie running and catching - Charly laying flat in the grass waiting to ambush her on her return trip. Charly can throw amazing body blocks for a 6 lb. dog. And now, no frisbee game is complete unless Charly is here to participate.
If Jessie goes a few days without her puppy "fix" she is impossible. She genuinely loves that little dog and thinks that he belongs to her and her household.
So....I'm thinking there may be a puppy in my (er - Jessie's) future because every girl truly needs a puppy - even a girl dog.
From the moment I learned Genevieve was getting a puppy for her birthday, my excitement ran high. I looked at the picture of that puppy on the breeders website and anticipated the day he would become a fuzzy member of our family.
In order to keep him a surprise until the big "reveal", Roger and I drove to Hazen, AR to pick him up for Kaylee. Do you believe in love at first sight (or bite?) He was just too precious for words and he rode all the way back to Fort Smith in my lap. We had taken Jessie (our princess dog) with us and she was less than impressed. I could read her little canine mind "Oh crap - here comes another dog!" She wanted nothing to do with him. She was further incensed over the fact that he was residing with us overnight and horrors or all horrors he slept in the bed with HER mother!!!
Genevieve took him home on Sunday and Jessie was most relieved to see him go.
I had agreed to take him to work with me to work on his potty training so every morning he loaded up with me and off we went. Some days he came home with me in the afternoon and Jessie was still undone over his presence.
But suddenly a funny thing happened. We started to notice that Jessie was sulking and appeared to be very unhappy. We couldn't figure out what her deal was, sick, bored, any number of maladies that could be affecting our precious girl dog.
We decided to experiment - we went and got Charly and brought him to our house. Good grief! Jessie was euphoric - they played great games of Frisbee in the yard. Jessie running and catching - Charly laying flat in the grass waiting to ambush her on her return trip. Charly can throw amazing body blocks for a 6 lb. dog. And now, no frisbee game is complete unless Charly is here to participate.
If Jessie goes a few days without her puppy "fix" she is impossible. She genuinely loves that little dog and thinks that he belongs to her and her household.
So....I'm thinking there may be a puppy in my (er - Jessie's) future because every girl truly needs a puppy - even a girl dog.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Girls Day Out
Today I spent the day with the Edwards girls today. We were invited to breakfast and we all enjoyed a great breakfast at Village Inn. Their Rio Grande Omelette is fantastic. The littles had their yearbooks from Christ the King school and they enjoyed looking over their pictures and reliving last year's school year. Both of the girls were so good at breakfast.
Then after breakfast we went to the cell phone store. Both Roger and Kaylee had cell phone issues to discuss so that worked out well. Then we had to explain to Genevieve why she couldn't have a cell phone at 7. We told her she wouldn't have anyone to call because no one her age had a cell phone yet. She also exhibited some interest in obtaining a motorcycle.
We came home and dropped Pawpaw off and then "just us girls" went to get our fingernails and toenails "done." The girls got honest to goodness spa pedicures complete with foot soaking and creative nail art. I got my nails done which was a huge relief to me since it had been since before I went to Texas. My fingernails aren't a big issue with me but my toes are practically impossible to do myself anymore. If I can manage to get my foot up high enough to reach my toes, I can't see what I'm doing to paint them.
I actually got desperate enough once to let Roger paint them for me. My toes looked like kitchen matches when he finished. Not only did he paint the nails, he painted all the skin around them as well. And can someone explain to me how a man with a construction/carpentry background who has house painters in his family doesn't comprehend painting WITH the grain on toenails. Bless his bones for trying though. He did say that it was MUCH more difficult than he expected it to be.
It was a great day and I enjoyed my girls so much today. I am a pretty happy mama right now since I have gotten to see MY girl so much this weekend.
I have a date with my BFF Judy Tuesday night. We are going to dinner and to see "The Time Traveler's Wife." We always try to take in a "chick flick" that we know we won't be able to talk our dear husbands into seeing with us. And we always pick movies that....A: Make us laugh so much we are in danger of being tossed from the theater.....or.....B: Bawl like babies and go home with red eyes and snotty noses.
Love my gals - friends and family alike.
Then after breakfast we went to the cell phone store. Both Roger and Kaylee had cell phone issues to discuss so that worked out well. Then we had to explain to Genevieve why she couldn't have a cell phone at 7. We told her she wouldn't have anyone to call because no one her age had a cell phone yet. She also exhibited some interest in obtaining a motorcycle.
We came home and dropped Pawpaw off and then "just us girls" went to get our fingernails and toenails "done." The girls got honest to goodness spa pedicures complete with foot soaking and creative nail art. I got my nails done which was a huge relief to me since it had been since before I went to Texas. My fingernails aren't a big issue with me but my toes are practically impossible to do myself anymore. If I can manage to get my foot up high enough to reach my toes, I can't see what I'm doing to paint them.
I actually got desperate enough once to let Roger paint them for me. My toes looked like kitchen matches when he finished. Not only did he paint the nails, he painted all the skin around them as well. And can someone explain to me how a man with a construction/carpentry background who has house painters in his family doesn't comprehend painting WITH the grain on toenails. Bless his bones for trying though. He did say that it was MUCH more difficult than he expected it to be.
It was a great day and I enjoyed my girls so much today. I am a pretty happy mama right now since I have gotten to see MY girl so much this weekend.
I have a date with my BFF Judy Tuesday night. We are going to dinner and to see "The Time Traveler's Wife." We always try to take in a "chick flick" that we know we won't be able to talk our dear husbands into seeing with us. And we always pick movies that....A: Make us laugh so much we are in danger of being tossed from the theater.....or.....B: Bawl like babies and go home with red eyes and snotty noses.
Love my gals - friends and family alike.
No more wasting away in Margaritaville!
One of the little pleasures in life for me has been to occasionally enjoy a Margarita on a Friday night after a difficult week. I've never had an alcohol problem (thank goodness!) If someone told me that I could never have another "adult" beverage I wouldn't be overly concerned. But it was nice to go to dinner with my husband and have a little "drinky poo."
That being said, the last 2 times I have enjoyed my Friday night indulgence I have woke up in the wee hours of the morning with a "splitting" headache. And I mean the kind that blinds you and makes you want to beat your head against the corner of the wall.
Now given the fact that I suffer from insomnia, anything that robs me of even a moments sleep is not to be tolerated. Therefore, Jimmy Buffet is going to have to "waste away" by himself. Maybe I can be a "cheeseburger in paradise" if I give up the alcoholic beverages. Maybe I can order Shirley Temples again like I had to when I was too young to drink.
That being said, the last 2 times I have enjoyed my Friday night indulgence I have woke up in the wee hours of the morning with a "splitting" headache. And I mean the kind that blinds you and makes you want to beat your head against the corner of the wall.
Now given the fact that I suffer from insomnia, anything that robs me of even a moments sleep is not to be tolerated. Therefore, Jimmy Buffet is going to have to "waste away" by himself. Maybe I can be a "cheeseburger in paradise" if I give up the alcoholic beverages. Maybe I can order Shirley Temples again like I had to when I was too young to drink.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Dancing With The Bores!
The fact that I have a serious addiction to a few things is no secret to my friends. FarmTown for 1, "The Tudors" for another, Coca-Cola, dogs and Dancing With The Stars. All of these things give me tiny little pleasures to look forward to apart from those that I look forward to as a member of a large family.
However, this year I am so not blown away by DWTS choices of "celebrity" and I use the term loosely.
Let us examine closer:
Aaron Carter - I actually thought this was a recent Greenwood High School graduate. Turns out he is the younger brother of a Backstreet Boy. Since I am not familiar with the BS Boys anyway the younger brother of one fails to move me to excitement.
Natalie Coughlin - ? - Olympic Swimmer. Well Olympians have historically done well in this competition but I'm afraid this will be "a fish out of water."
Mark Dacascos - I confess I am a little excited by this one since I also am a closet Iron Chef watcher. They need to let him do double duty and announce the dances as well "This weeks secret dance is................The Paso Doble!"
Tom Delay - Former Republican House Majority Leader - I won't even comment on the probable hundreds of improprieties here. He's a politician 'nuff said!
Macy Gray - R & B Singer - would probably love to hear her not so sure about watching her.
Ashley Hamilton - son of the "TAN MAN" George Hamilton. Does this make Ashley "BEIGE BOY"? He's kind of pretty to look at but he's certainly no Gilles Marini **sigh**.
Melissa Joan Hart - star of "Clarissa"???? and "Sabrina the Teenage Witch"?????, apparently there was a whole decade of TV programming that I missed. Have I been in a coma lately? If not this seasons DWTS is likely to put me there.
Kathy Ireland - Super Model - heavy on the SUPER. Well if setting one's jaw in determination will win it she's your girl. She has one of the most pronounced jaw lines I have ever seen. Of course, she will look great in the costumes.
Michael Irvin - Dallas Cowboy Football Star extraordinaire! Football players usually manage quite nicely in this program. I like Michael pretty well in general so I will give him a pass on my scathing comments.
Joanna Krupa - Supermodel - Who?? Another great costume wearer I'm sure the wardrobe department is having to be sedated due to their EXTREME anticipation!!
Chuck Liddell - UFC Champ. I'm not completely sure what UFC is and why they have a champion. Since there's an F in the title it must be some sort of fisticuffs. **Yawn**
PEOPLE ARE YOU QUIVERING WITH EXCITEMENT YET?
Debi Mazar - actress - and I'm pretty sure the wife of one of the Volturi from the Twilight saga. I just find her strange looking and wouldn't be surprised if she came to the competition wearing a trenchcoat and packing heat to blow away the other dancers.
Mya - R & B singer - Again, could we hear her perform please. She could be a ringer since I believe she was in the movie "Chicago". She may indeed have some moves worth mentioning. Besides she is one of the one name celebrities like "Michael" "Cher" "Prince" they always try harder to be noticed.
Louie Vito - snowboarder - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'll refrain from anything else **SNORE**
Donny Osmond - well this was a no brainer. The whole time Marie was on the show I kept expecting him to leap up from the audience, throw a body block on her and step in to take her place. Never have I seen anyone who wanted to be on this show more. And of course since he has like a Bajillion cousins there will be no way we can avoid watching him through the whole thing.
AND
I SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST...........drum roll please..............
Kelly Osbourne - HAHAHAHAHAHA ROFLAMAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHA **gasp** deep breathing to try to get my hysterical laughing under control.....LOL. I would just hate to have the job of the censor on this show. This girl cannot construct a sentence that isn't so vulgar and crude that one's ears bleed. I'll bet they are equipping their "bleep" button with rapid click right now. The "F" bomb is her adjective of choice and I can just hear her telling Carrie Ann to go straight to the devil in much plainer English. Hopefully, Ozzie won't be there and Carrie Ann can forego the trip.
And that's the way I see it friends and neighbors. I hope that something will happen to "hook" me early on 'cause right now there's not much to make my heart go pitty pat.
However, this year I am so not blown away by DWTS choices of "celebrity" and I use the term loosely.
Let us examine closer:
Aaron Carter - I actually thought this was a recent Greenwood High School graduate. Turns out he is the younger brother of a Backstreet Boy. Since I am not familiar with the BS Boys anyway the younger brother of one fails to move me to excitement.
Natalie Coughlin - ? - Olympic Swimmer. Well Olympians have historically done well in this competition but I'm afraid this will be "a fish out of water."
Mark Dacascos - I confess I am a little excited by this one since I also am a closet Iron Chef watcher. They need to let him do double duty and announce the dances as well "This weeks secret dance is................The Paso Doble!"
Tom Delay - Former Republican House Majority Leader - I won't even comment on the probable hundreds of improprieties here. He's a politician 'nuff said!
Macy Gray - R & B Singer - would probably love to hear her not so sure about watching her.
Ashley Hamilton - son of the "TAN MAN" George Hamilton. Does this make Ashley "BEIGE BOY"? He's kind of pretty to look at but he's certainly no Gilles Marini **sigh**.
Melissa Joan Hart - star of "Clarissa"???? and "Sabrina the Teenage Witch"?????, apparently there was a whole decade of TV programming that I missed. Have I been in a coma lately? If not this seasons DWTS is likely to put me there.
Kathy Ireland - Super Model - heavy on the SUPER. Well if setting one's jaw in determination will win it she's your girl. She has one of the most pronounced jaw lines I have ever seen. Of course, she will look great in the costumes.
Michael Irvin - Dallas Cowboy Football Star extraordinaire! Football players usually manage quite nicely in this program. I like Michael pretty well in general so I will give him a pass on my scathing comments.
Joanna Krupa - Supermodel - Who?? Another great costume wearer I'm sure the wardrobe department is having to be sedated due to their EXTREME anticipation!!
Chuck Liddell - UFC Champ. I'm not completely sure what UFC is and why they have a champion. Since there's an F in the title it must be some sort of fisticuffs. **Yawn**
PEOPLE ARE YOU QUIVERING WITH EXCITEMENT YET?
Debi Mazar - actress - and I'm pretty sure the wife of one of the Volturi from the Twilight saga. I just find her strange looking and wouldn't be surprised if she came to the competition wearing a trenchcoat and packing heat to blow away the other dancers.
Mya - R & B singer - Again, could we hear her perform please. She could be a ringer since I believe she was in the movie "Chicago". She may indeed have some moves worth mentioning. Besides she is one of the one name celebrities like "Michael" "Cher" "Prince" they always try harder to be noticed.
Louie Vito - snowboarder - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'll refrain from anything else **SNORE**
Donny Osmond - well this was a no brainer. The whole time Marie was on the show I kept expecting him to leap up from the audience, throw a body block on her and step in to take her place. Never have I seen anyone who wanted to be on this show more. And of course since he has like a Bajillion cousins there will be no way we can avoid watching him through the whole thing.
AND
I SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST...........drum roll please..............
Kelly Osbourne - HAHAHAHAHAHA ROFLAMAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHA **gasp** deep breathing to try to get my hysterical laughing under control.....LOL. I would just hate to have the job of the censor on this show. This girl cannot construct a sentence that isn't so vulgar and crude that one's ears bleed. I'll bet they are equipping their "bleep" button with rapid click right now. The "F" bomb is her adjective of choice and I can just hear her telling Carrie Ann to go straight to the devil in much plainer English. Hopefully, Ozzie won't be there and Carrie Ann can forego the trip.
And that's the way I see it friends and neighbors. I hope that something will happen to "hook" me early on 'cause right now there's not much to make my heart go pitty pat.
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