……….scrape………….scrape….tap,tap,tap. Testing 1-2-3, mic check, mic check!
I’ve drug my soap box to the center of the room, climbed up and tested my microphone. I’m about to get all over something that makes me furious.
I just heard a story about a couple who was present at the birth of their adopted daughter. The adoptive father cut the child’s umbilical cord and with that act along with the biological parent’s signing over their rights – three people became a family. A good family.
A beautiful child went home with two loving people who worshipped her and got busy with the business of raising a happy healthy individual.
Now 2 years later, she has been ripped from the arms of her “parents” put in a car with people she doesn’t know and driven 1200 miles away from her home. Why? Because the biological father has changed his mind and some judge in their infinite wisdom? has decided biology trumps everything. It is also heavily weighted in the fact that the father is of an ethnicity different than the parents because that ethnicity is being diminished. HUH? This one child is going to save an entire race of people? Wow!
I’m willing to admit that the father regrets his decision and wishes he’d never made it – but does that give him the right to place his own feelings over those of the child who has never known anything but stability and love. In my opinion – no, it does not.
I remember the two women in the Bible arguing over the child – and one saying “give HER the child” rather than have it harmed. Is this not the sign of a real parent? I have very personal experience in the nature vs. nurture arena and nature just isn’t all its’ cracked up to be sometimes.
For two years there have been countless colds, ear infections, bad dreams, cuts and scrapes along with first words, first steps, birthdays, Christmas trees, family gatherings full of hugs and kisses and full laps. That child has learned who she can count on, who is always going to be there to kiss it better, make the boogie man go away and tickle her till she dissolves into hysterical fits of laughter.
At 2 she is well on her way to being the person she is supposed to be. This change in geography, socio-economic levels and personalities could well arrest her development. Isn’t it likely she will become confused about who she is and what has happened to the people she loves? I know children are remarkably adaptable but there are some adaptations they shouldn’t have to make.
People make decisions everyday and often they live to regret those decisions. However, for most of us we have to learn to live with the consequences of our actions. I’m just not sure if deciding you don’t want a child and then changing your mind should give you an automatic do-over.
So…I will pray for little Veronika and her parents. I will also pray for her biological father to understand she should come first always.
3 comments:
As an adopted child, this is very near and dear to my heart. That should NEVER be allowed to happen. I thank God every day that my birth mother made the decision to give me to the incredible parents that God picked out just for me. There should NEVER be a time when, for convenience or to alleviate guilt, a child is returned to biological "parents." And this "ethnicity" thing - is there an endangered ethnic group this child is to save? Really? My prayer is that this biological "parent" will come to his/her senses and return that child to her REAL parents. The one who have loved her through the sleepless nights and the ear aches and tummy aches and broken hearts. I'm climbing right up there on your soap box with you!
You say it loud and proud! Amen and I agree. This is a hoffic miscarriage of justice. It took 2 YEARS to decide you made a mistake??? Really??? This is ao sad and so horrible. I pray that little child will someday know that her parents were ripped away from her and she was not "returned".
When do the rights of the adoptive parents get honored. So
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