I don’t understand this…..you can’t make me understand this. When did a simple little ordinary hamburger lose its’ entire identity as an individual item?
Apparently one of our favorite fast food chains (who shall remain nameless) – but they do have a big disturbing clown as their spokes annoyance – refuses to recognize the lowly hamburger.
You can order it but what you will receive is a cheeseburger/no cheese. It takes 12 additional characters on their sales ticket to produce a hamburger. I’m pretty sure the plain old hamburger came first – is it fair that now all things burger must be linked with cheese? What about the lactose intolerant? And Wimpy, what is to become of poor Wimpy who will gladly pay you tomorrow for a hamburger today?!
And what about the message here? We are going to print on your ticket what a bothersome wench you are by daring to order merely hamburger when everyone in the free world KNOWS there must be cheese.
I actually like cheese…………..in fact…………….I pretty much LOVE cheese, but oddly enough I’ve never wanted it on my burger. But since I am surely causing someone a great deal of work by NOT allowing them to slap cheese on my order, I shall adjust.
From now on I’m going to order a cheeseburger WITH.GOUDA.CHEESE – when they inform me they do not have that cheese, I will work my way down the list of exotic dairy products, FETA, LIMBURGER, SWISS…….the possibilities are endless!
At some point they will certainly inform me that my only option is an AMERICAN cheese clone substitute. Then, I will say “I didn’t really want cheese but since you don’t offer a plain hamburger I thought I should at least get the cheese I prefer.
By now, I’m pretty certain there will be a significant line of honking cars behind me, perhaps one or two angry words and some interesting hand signals. Ask me if I care…….just give me my danged HAMBURGER – I don’t feel the need to explain to you that I want you to hold the cheese.
1 comment:
amen sista!
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