We Just Don’t Go There Anymore

Sooooo…..it is December 31st – New Year’s Eve.  And everyone, including me is contemplating the past year, anticipating the new one and perhaps remembering some New Years Eves of long long ago.

I am always all about the excitement of NYE, except I’m seldom awake to see it, this is why in August I usually have a very well chilled bottle of unopened champagne in my fridge.

But sometimes I like to go back, waaaaaaay back into the archives of my younger and much more fun self and pluck out a particularly interesting tidbit. 

Once, long long ago, in a galaxy far far away, I existed in a whole different realm.  I had quite a lot of freedom, more than enough money and some really fun and crazy friends.  One of these friends was a single guy who had recently turned 40 with no prospects of matrimony on his horizon.  It wasn’t that there was anything wrong with him, quite the contrary, he was a big – good looking guy, rough and tough, loved to dance and he was perfectly okay being swept along in our big group outings.

We all thought it would be great fun to pitch in and purchase a “girlfriend” for him for his milestone birthday.  Just so you know, we did not lower ourselves to purchasing a “real” girl, instead we ordered one for him.  She was remarkably hideous looking.  Dolores as she was named, had a shock of wild red, red hair that looked like a toddler’s first Barbie doll – after they’ve cut its hair and washed it in the toilet.

Sadly, Dolores came to us sans wardrobe.  Dolores proved to be the practical joke that we played on ourselves as Mister X LOVED her.  He thought she was the best thing ever, he loved to stick her in the passenger seat of his truck and trundle her up and down the highway.  He was constantly trying to get one of us to “fix” her hair, we declined, offering instead to purchase clothing for her.  He declined.

We came to regret our gift when one New Years Eve, Mister X decided to take Dolores in with him to a party at the Hilton where he proceeded to dance with her in the lobby.  They were asked to leave.  Poor Dolores, it was her first real party and she didn’t get to stay.  Maybe we should have relented and fixed her hair.

But in a show of solidarity for our friends, we all left in a huff.  After all, if Mister X and Dolores were not welcome, we didn’t want to stay either.  And the Hilton is happy to report – We Just Don’t Go There Anymore.

Happy New Year Everybody – put on your best clothes, fix your hair and dance with your best girl, even if it is just in your own living room.