It has taken me a while to write about this. Mainly because I wanted to make sure that the person involved had truly moved on and was no longer bothered by it.
My husband, a veteran and disabled with two knee replacements, has struggled with the fact that he feels he no longer has a purpose in life....spelled J O B. I think a lot of us don't realize just how much self worth is attributed by being gainfully employed - particularly to men. It is really difficult when that desire to remain productive has a qualifier of "things you really shouldn't do with two metal knees." Few people truly understand that doesn't inhibit your interest in doing something and yet even more people will ask that person to do the very things they shouldn't. First rule of artificial knees - don't kneel and for God's sake don't spend a lot of time ascending and descending ladders. Now when construction was your "go to" skill when the world went crazy and you lost your "using your thinker" job, that makes for a frustrated man.
Because of my hearing trouble, I enlisted the help of the Arkansas Rehabilitation Department who were very helpful in burning the underbrush of job search and helping me find something possible. Therefore, when Roger truly decided he wanted to a) do something other than build crap for me and b) make a little money doing it, we went to ARD again.
Recently, they hooked Roger up with an online training program that would teach you in a 3 week 8 hour a day on line class how to provide customer service. (Think of those people you get when your garage door opener won't work - or you can't find the battery compartment in your whoozits). Well, this seemed good....work from home, kind of technical....Yay! Plus, they were very veteran friendly.
Based on this program, we invested in a new laptop with Windows 10 - (trust me, if you aren't familiar with this operating system, you better get on board NOW), we invested in a second monitor, a microphone headset and had already called our internet provider to have our internet speed bumped up with ethernet because we were deemed "inadequate."
Class began, and a whole lot of time was spent with the trainer not being able to access their own teaching modules, trying to figure things out, etc. And yet....Roger persisted staying sat in a chair for hours on end, waiting for them to get their stuff back on line after crashing, etc. Then, two and half days into training as he was trying to move into a new module, his credentials quit working. He tried repeatedly to log in and got nowhere until he received a message telling him someone would be calling him shortly.
He waited two hours and finally they called and told him his computer skills weren't adequate for what they required. Please know that in all the preliminary talks regarding this "job" they did not mention you had to be proficient in Windows 10 or what your internet speed needed to be. Just internet connectivity and basic computer skills were required.
So, in essence, after spending a bunch of money and 2 1/2 days of his time he was "fired" from a training program. That helps a person's ego now doesn't it?
Roger is one of those people who just goes silent and deep with things like this. However, I am one of those people who goes nuclear and loud. The first thing I did was call the ARD and tell them what happened as they provide those online training programs with a lot of their people which translates into a lot of $ for those companies. I rattled every cage in every zoo I could find.
Now, the training program wants to have him back in the program, but we think no. It's kind of like being newly married and coming home the day after the honeymoon, to find your spouse has run off with the mailman - the trust is broken, plus we don't think we can afford them.
I am absolutely happy with the knowledge that the ARD probably has made their ears bleed with their disapproval over how this was handled and that they are also further armed with a lot of information they did not have prior to this event.
Hopefully, there are still people out there who look at people who are "mostly retired" but still productive, honest, dependable, smart, and willing that will say to themselves "hey, I don't need a full time body....but I could use a guy like that 10 or 15 hours a week." And hopefully, there are even more people out there willing to go to bat for those men and women who still want to say "I work to pay my bills and take care of my family" - even if that family is only a bunch of little brown dogs.